The Deanfortythree Guide to NaNoWriMo

It’s almost NaNoWriMo! You have no clue what you’re going to write about, do you? I didn’t think so! And no clue how you’re going to pull it off? That either, I know. Well, never fear, I’m here with all the handy tips you’ll need to make it to December with whatever sanity you have intact!

Give Up Now: Let’s be honest, you’re not going to make it. Why not beat the rush and just quit now? Then take to your favorite social media platform and ridicule your friends as they toil in vain! Take pleasure in each one who fails, gives up and joins you. That is your NaNoWriMo. You’ll enjoy it 10000% more.

Do Not Plan Ahead: If you’re going to insist on going ahead with some insane word count goal, don’t plan it out. That will just drive you crazy. Wing it. Plus, you’re basically Hemmingway, Shelley, and King all rolled into one, so there you’ll be ahead of the curve by day three anyway.

Share Your Word Count: At least every hour. Everyone is waiting for those updates. Hashtag it up, too. Something like “#wordcount: 12 #writing #amwriting #NaNoWriMo #lookitme” should do it. The world awaits your brilliance.

Edit as you Go: Don’t be the dork who comes out of NaNoWriMo with a first draft. This is the GREAT AMERICAN NOVEL, not some hack crap. Make sure every sentence is perfect before moving on.

Surf the Internet: Inspiration is a combination of lightning striking and magic. You never know when, where or how it will hit, so maximize your chances by scouring every corner of the internet. I recommend three windows of twenty tabs apiece. You won’t miss anything THAT way.

Panic if you Fall Behind: This is the killer. You get a little behind, and you’re screwed. Cancel all your plans, and scribble furiously until you’re caught up (then make sure you edit it, as above).

 

There you go! You’re all set for a great NaNoWriMo!

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